When I hear the command echoing across social media to "bring out the best version of yourself," I feel that something vital is being silenced. What fate, then, do we assign to that version we like less, the one we label as our shadow self?
Must we reject it? Bury it under deep layers of sand, hoping in vain that it will never surface? Experience shows us that it does emerge; it comes out precisely when we deem it least opportune: it is the minor provocation that makes us lose our composure, or the sharp sadness that floods the heart when we witness an injustice. It appears when the longed-for recognition vanishes, or when life subjects us to the inevitable suffering of change.
Is it true, then, that I must only expose my "best version"?
True wholeness, it seems to me, resides in the audacity of being complete: of accepting my entire self, light and shadow. It is about recognizing that shadow, sitting with it without judgment, and only then, once accepted, deciding not to follow that path. My choice will be, instead, to water the seeds I also carry within: those of joy, peace, unconditional love, and kindness.
Society constantly pushes us toward the sun, urging us to be wonderful and special beings, ignoring our right to be human. But what about the sadness that overcomes me when I lose a loved one? What about legitimate anger or boiling frustration?
The constant impulse of the "best version" we see on social media—where everyone poses at the peak of joy—leaves us wondering: how do they, the immortals of permanent happiness, manage those moments of lows? How do they live with and accept their Yin part? Yin?
In my classes, I propose self-observation. Balance always begins with a question: Where does my Yin part lead me, and where does my Yang part lead me? How do I achieve harmony?
I do this through deep listening, non-judgmental self-observation of my two poles, and radical acceptance. And when I see that my thoughts are trying to drag me toward melancholy or anger, I direct my gaze toward the simple beauty that surrounds me, to the small achievements I have made today, and I smile. The simple act of smiling calms me and renews my confidence.
I then understand that true authenticity blossoms in full harmony with my integral self, embracing every aspect of my being with love and unconditional acceptance. Only from this foundation will it be possible for me to map out and illuminate the path that leads me toward the Light my soul craves.
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